I have to sacrifice you?

Who's ready to rumble?

Not I. Because, Dear Reader, I've grown quite fond of you. And I think you're something special. And war means that you might become collateral damage.

And I think that would be a tragedy. You are, according to the cliché, a unique and beautiful snowflake.

At least, those of you who aren't busy typing the word "peeing" into my search field. You people, I just wonder about.